We grow older, do we grow wiser? What have I learned this past year as a new Grammy? There seems to be more options, decisions and choices to make about child raising. There just might be more choices, in life. When I attended college women were limited in careers. I could be a teacher, a nurse, a counselor, or a secretary. Few women in those days became lawyers or doctors, or sales executives. The jobs of today were not even invented then, and clearly not calling to women. Today, unlimited choices.
The same is true for parenting. You can bottle feed, breast feed, pump, or all of the above. Your child can share your bed, stay in their crib, or share your room, in their crib. You can feed your child only organic food, prepared food, make your own, or just breast feed. Many many more choices, and no right or wrongs, only belief systems, and lots of books to support it.
I have tried to understand and stay current on all the variables. My mother in law, would not have liked this. I try to stay open minded and adapt.
I have learned that love and worry both expand when you have grandchildren. I have a love and worry umbrella. It is constantly inflated to include the new baby, the future baby, and their parents. It is ever growing, as my precious "P" is ill or unhappy. You love more you worry more. Grandchildren are the true addiction of choice.
I have learned that I do not rule the world. ( I already new that, I just hate to admit it.) My pediatrician used to say, " mother's do not cause illness, mothers do not cure illness). This is truer when you are a grandparent watching the action unfold.
Finally I have learned to talk out my concerns, with my friends. Their issues are my issues, and we support each other. It is bonding with my friends and admiring their dedication and unfailing loyalty to their grandchildren, that binds us. My friends are wonderful grandparents and I hope they are always appreciated.
I do my best, grandpa too. I try not to interfere, and to censor my opinions. Do I succeed? As our late mayor used to say, "How Am I Doing"? I try hard... very hard, I really do.
Write to me tell me your experiences, I would love to publish them as comments. Judy