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Monday, October 28, 2013

I Really Hate The Kardashian's

 I was babysitting the adorable Baby B, and the TV was on. Some people talk on the phone all day. Some people use the radio as company, I like to have the TV on.  It has always been that way for me. I started with Good Day New York. Rosanne and Greg were discussing Kim Kardashian who had just received her third engagement ring.  They were also discussing her booty shot.  For those of you who do not watch, hear or read the papers this was a picture showing lots of  bottom, hiding her stomach and being blonde. She is now 33, and still playing the young ingenue.  I don't like that family. Their morals and values, and life makes me nauseous. I think the family has cashed in on a name they don't deserve to use.  I think their mother uses them as a commodity, and sells to the highest bidder.  You know the word, I don't have to use it.

Next came Queen Latifah, my new favorite. She mentioned Kim and Kanye in passing.  Her show is not so much into gossip, more music and good deeds. I am a big fan of hers.  I admire her clothes and talent.


After Queen Latifa, I went to Wendy Williams.  Guess who she was discussing?.  I like Wendy, she speaks her mind.  She has made a bet that Kim Kardashian and Kanye West will never marry,  She is willing to eat crow on National TV if they do.  Crow is now endangered and she will have to substitute something else which she will add a lot of hot sauce too.  You thought that show was educational.


Next The View and Kim, was discussed again.  I am presently reading Barbara Walters autobiography and they try hard to keep the show tasteful.  I think Whoopy Goldberg would skip the whole discussion but you have to give the people what they want.  They seem to want more Kim, Kanye, Nori and Lamar Oden the drug user.  Poor poor little Kardashians what a complicated life they live, for all of us to see, hear and enjoy.


After that I took the baby for a walk.  That night I had a dream/ nightmare about the Kardashian's .. Bruce was fighting to return to the spotlight..... he asked me for help.  Maybe I will skip TV next week?  What do you think?  I hear Tori Spelling is very poor.

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Stranger On The Street

I don't talk to strangers.  I don't say hello to random people, I don't look at their eyes, I don't smile. I live in a small town. I guess I could, but I don't.  Maybe it's because I spent so many years working in dangerous neighborhoods. I don't want to draw attention to myself.


A few mornings ago, Stormy and I were out for our very early morning walk and there were four police cars and lights blinking, on the street.  There was a young man seated on the sidewalk next to a big book bag.  The police were chatting with each other.  I was across the street but I clearly saw the young man, and wondered.


This morning we headed out and I was thinking about the chilly air, and Stormy and babysitting later in the day.  I sing a lot when I walk Stormy, mostly to myself.  I find each day comes with its own song.  Not today, no song.  I passed the usual row of stores, and saw the young man.  He was standing in the door way of the shop I just passed, smoking a cigarette. I was startled but did not stop.  I have no wallet, or phone, only Stormy.  Was I frightened?.  Not yet.  We turned for home after Stormy's business was done.  The young man passed me, walked by the big Church on the block, and turned to see if I was watching him. 


I am thinking about this...this stranger on the street.

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

What's A Mother To Do?

I had breakfast with friends I only see a few times a year. We discuss life, families and the pursuit of happiness.  This group of ladies share a more extreme religious view then I do, so our topics are always interesting and somewhat educational for me.  This breakfast produced the following story.


As told to the group.  My son is 44 years old. He lives in another city.  He has never been married.  He barely earns a living.  It is enough for him to get by.  He tells me he has met a young woman.  She is 23 years old and he believes she is interested in him.  He has been wrong in the past.  She is marriage and baby minded.  This is a terrible predicament.


I was listening carefully.  I was thinking how happy this mother must be that her son had possibly found someone  to share his life with, and possibly start a family with.  This was not the case. She was worried that her son could not afford a wife. He could not afford children, and he lived to far for her to offer support.  She was going to advise him to run, not walk away from this relationship.


I was shocked, and dismayed. Don't you wish him happiness I asked?  This won't make him happy she said, trouble that is all this is!  I did not stay at breakfast much longer.  Now I was distressed.  Why did a 44 year old man need his mother's permission to move forward in his life?  Why would a mother discourage growth and the chance for love for her child?  What do you think?  Write a reply and tell me.

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Jill's Blog

This is Jill's blog. It has received a lot of attention.  It appears in World Of Psychology. We have not heard what baby B thinks of his mommy's blog yet.  Let me know your opinion.  Writers run in the family.


Why You Should Let Your Baby Be FrustratedAs a new mom and a recent MSW graduate, I can’t help but analyze, question, and sometimes fear the ways in which my parenting choices will affect my son.
During the few months I was home with my baby, I joined a moms group. Now that the babies are three or four months old, the conversations sound like “my baby will not sleep in the crib,” “my baby wakes up every three hours,” “my baby needs to be held all day.”
From a recommendation, I read Bringing Up Bébé: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting when I was pregnant. The 2012 book is written by Pamela Druckerman, an American mom raising her baby in Paris.
At first glance, I thought the book was a witty tongue-in-cheek story about neurotic Americans and cool Parisians. On second glance (and a second reading after I birthed the child), I realized this book unlocked the secrets of raising a happy, resilient adult.

Ms. Druckerman charmingly explains the many ways in which French children differ from American children. On the surface, it appears that American children are less patient, less polite and throw more tantrums. American parents may think it’s cute and innocent; their kids will grow out of it. And it is true, the child may eventually stop the behavior, but the coping skills (or lack of) have been firmly set in stone.
I do not believe Druckerman was writing a book on human development, but to a social worker, it seems her observations directly relate to why so many American adults seek therapy. Therapists’ offices are filled with adults who suffer from anxiety, depression, anger management issues, eating disorders or marital problems. Any psychoanalyst would tell you that many of these issues are deeply rooted in childhood.
American parents seem overly worried that if their child hears “no” they will become angry and experience frustration and disappointment. On the contrary, the French believe that “no” saves children from the tyranny of their own desires. Caroline
Thompson, a family psychologist in Paris whom Druckerman interviewed, stated what seems to be the overall view in France: “making kids face up to limitations and deal with frustration turns them into happier, more resilient people.” Isn’t that what every parent wants for their child?
“French parents don’t worry that they’re going to damage their kids by frustrating them. To the contrary, they think their kids will be damaged if they can’t cope with frustration. They also treat coping with frustration as a core life skill. Their kids simply have to learn it. The parents would be remiss if they didn’t teach it.”
Druckerman interviewed pediatrician and founder of Tribeca Pediatrics, Michel Cohen, a French doctor practicing in New York City. “My first intervention is to say, when your baby is born, just don’t jump on your kid at night,” Cohen says.
“Give your baby a chance to self-soothe, don’t automatically respond, even from birth.” “Le pause,” as Druckerman coins it, is one of the main ways to gently induce frustration. The French believe “le pause” can start as early as two to three weeks old.
Although “le pause” may sound like tough love for a infant, most American parents end up surrendering to the “cry it out” method at three to four months because their baby never learned to self-soothe. “Le pause” worked for me, although I did not consciously subscribe to this method. I think it was a combination of sleep deprivation and C-section recovery that created “le pause,” but it worked! “Le pause” creates babies who are content to snuggle alone in their cribs, babies who at a very young age learn to soothe themselves.
And hopefully “le pause” creates adults who can cope with frustration, a skill that is extremely useful and necessary for success in work and relationships and dealing with the overall stressors of everyday life.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Bakers, The Variety Store

This story is about an ordinary village, with an ordinary store, named Bakers. Bakers was a variety store.  Before dollar stores and after five and dimes, there were variety stores.  It was a large store taking up most of the block.  When I moved to this town people said the supermarkets were just OK.  Lots of bagel and nail salons, but you really need to go to Bakers.


Bakers had long isles, and dim lights. No matter what I needed Bakers seemed to have it. I bought index cards, plastic laminate, a crochet hook,  and knee highs. The prices were reasonable, put on with the sticky tape that never comes off the plastic wrap. I hurried in and out of that store, even though I wanted to see all the items in it.  It was not a very welcoming store.


The reason it was not inviting was the people who worked there.  The man behind the counter ringing up the purchases was tall and thin. He had a bad complexion and his teeth clearly needed a visit to the dentist. He answered my questions in one word responses.  Once he sent me down an isle to find an item and when I turned he had left the register and was in back of me.  Other people worked in the store, I think.  They all looked the same, or were the same person I was never sure/  I always thought how the workers should get out of the store more.


The store was owned by Mr. Baker.  I did see him a few times and he looked like a customer not a worker.  Sadly, the store closed. Mr. Baker's wife died and he moved to Florida.  The store remained empty for a long time, and then rented by an organization.  There was a tragic accident and a child was killed in the store. A car slammed through the window.  The store remains empty though it has new windows, new lighting, and a new entrance.


I miss the convenience, but after reading Stephen King all my life, I honestly don't regret the demise of Bakers the variety store.

Thursday, October 3, 2013

Easy Simple and Quick Recipes I Love!

My mother in law used to say that I found the simplest, fastest way to do anything.  This is an early childhood educator's talent. Today I am bringing you 3 fast , simple terrific recipes.  I found them all on the Internet and will include the link to the articles and complete directions.  I think they are great, hope you do too!


1.  Weight Watchers muffins.  1 box cake mix, any brand or flavor, the chocolate were terrific. Add 1 can pumpkin, all natural, not the pie filling, and 1 cup water and bake.  This is a 2 point muffin, or about 120 calories.  No eggs, filling and fiber too!


2. Ravioli Lasagna... Prepare lasagna as you would.  Use fresh or packaged pre made raviolis, instead of the noodles  Any brand, any flavor.  Prepare and bake. Fast and fantastic, who knew?
3. One pot spaghetti dinner. At the end I threw in a package of frozen meatballs. The sauce is thicker then usual, so fast, easy and grand!
Click here: » One Pot Wonder Tomato Basil Pasta Recipe         Enjoy, let me know what you think.  Judy